


Intimacy

by youve_found_me



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Cuddling, Light Angst, M/M, Slight pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-21
Updated: 2020-12-05
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:07:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,425
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27532747
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/youve_found_me/pseuds/youve_found_me
Summary: In which Remus and Patton share an intimate moment as Remus ponders their relationship.
Relationships: Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders
Comments: 14
Kudos: 28





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Recently I've been trying to write things without dialogue, this was one of those things. (Also Remus is still quite tame in this fic)

Patton and Remus lay entangled on the creative side's bedroom floor together. Patton's head laid on Remus' chest and their legs were wrapped around each others. They had been like this for almost 10 minutes without talking. Patton had busied himself by tracing small circles on the others chest with his finger while Remus was lost in thought.  
  
The main reason they were like this is because Remus found himself having a moment. A moment when every thought in the world was running through his head, but at the same time his mind was completely empty. Patton had walked in on him laying there and decided to join him out of solidarity. Plus, Patton had been wanting to cuddle with someone for a while.  
  
Remus hadn't reacted much to Patton joining him, almost like he was in a completely different world and had left his body behind. At some point he must have come back because he interrupted Patton's rhythmic drawings by grabbing onto the sides hand. They both adjusted themselves so they could look each other in the eyes. Remus always found it incredibly interesting that Patton's hands were always cold. It reminded him of a dead body and that was extremely grounding for him. Despite that thought, the overall air was intimate. Remus didn't really mind much, and he's not sure if Patton really realized the extent of the intimacy in this room.  
  
Remus sat up and Patton did the same, neither breaking eye contact. Remus, who was still holding onto to Patton's hand, let go and instead summoned a pen. He placed it gently in Patton's open hand before rolling up his sleeve. The smallest smile crossed the others face as he twisted his body to draw. He gently placed his cold hands on Remus' arm and held them there for a minute before actually starting to draw. Remus feared talking would ruin the moment, so he just let Patton doodle his heart out.  
  
For the first time since Patton got here, Remus started thinking about the world outside of them. Did Patton tell the others where he went? Were they looking for him? Would Roman be mad to find him here? Would Virgil? Maybe this would be the last time they do this. He looked over at Patton. To Remus, he was an enigma. He was both scary and incredibly attractive. He was his complete opposite, but they were also incredibly similar. Remus never realized he could have so much in common with the light side's golden child.  
  
Remus examined the boy in front of him. His glasses were on the tip of his nose, threatening to fall off at any minute, and his hair had fallen in front of his face when he leaned over Remus' arm. It looked really soft. As Remus reached out to touch the others hair he felt it again. The intimacy.  
  
It's likely that Patton was like this with everyone. He carried intimacy around like a backpack, but Remus wasn't used to it. He wonders how the others react to this feeling. Remus finds himself subconsciously leaning into it, welcoming it with half open arms. In this moment, he felt guilty because Remus loved Patton.  
  
In the icky, Roman kind of way, and he's not sure if Patton liked him back. He wouldn't dare ask. He'd rather eat his own hand then ask Patton what he thought of him. Remus knows better than anyone that Patton has the ability to hate. He has the ability to do a lot of the things that the others don't recognize. It left a bitter taste in his mouth thinking about it.  
  
From a young age, they were taught to hate each other. Patton was supposed to stay away from Remus at all cost and Remus was supposed to make him cower, and for the longest time they played their roles. Remus took extreme join in it for a while, it became so much more than just playing their roles. It became almost therapeutic.  
  
And then something changed. Remus accidentally found Patton when he didn't want to be found, and then Patton did the same. After that they started to have secret meetings like this one. No one knew about anything. The taboo of the relationship made it all the more exciting for Remus, but even he could admit it was tiring. Yet here he laid, with a crush on the side that was currently drawing on his arm, and he couldn't help but wonder if Patton felt that same.  
  
Both of the sides were so engrossed in the moment, in each other, that they didn't hear the door open.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm a sucker for writing ambiguous endings, but I am very tempted to continue this.
> 
> I continued it :)


	2. Are you going to rat us out?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Janus tries to locate everyone's whereabouts and finds himself at a crossroad

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I struggled with an ending for this one because I decided on giving you guys a full mini story.  
> Also I was planning on doing no dialogue again, but I had to add some in the end. Other than that, enjoy!

Janus was light on his feet, even when he wasn't trying. If you could hear him walking, then it was too quiet. Today was one of those times when it was just that. He knew the quiet was coming from the dark sides area, but he still decided to locate everyone first. Roman was taking up the living room; he had the tv on, two laptops, his phone, and 3 separate paper piles. Logan was with Thomas, and Janus didn't bother to take anything more than a peek. Virgil was in his room, with his door the slightest bit open. Looking through the crack, Janus could see him laying on his bed with his headphones in. He made minimal noise, but it was there if you listened hard enough. That was all for the light sides area.  
  
The dark sides area was deathly quiet, Janus could hear his steps echo throughout the hallways. Having Remus around usually didn't allow this, but even he goes quiet sometimes. It must be one of those times. If so, then he would either be in the living room or in his room, but that didn't answer one question. Where was Patton? Janus counted everyone on his fingers while walking.  
  
Roman was in the living room.  
  
Logan was with Thomas.  
  
Virgil was in his room.  
  
And Remus was most likely in his room.  
  
Patton hadn't been with any of them, and from what he could tell, he wasn't in his own room either. Janus tried to think of the places he hadn't checked, perhaps he had just missed him?  
  
Janus stopped in front of Remus' door. He could hardly hear anything due to the thickness, but he had a feeling Remus was in there. The knob squeaked upon being touched and the door creaked at any movement, still, no sound came from the within the room itself. Janus peeked inside and surveyed the scene. The first thing he noticed was Patton. He was hunched over one of Remus' arms doing something while Remus laid on the floor, his free hand raking through the first boys hair. Neither were talking and they both seemed extremely comfortable in each others presence.  
  
Janus felt like he was intruding and didn't want to interrupt. Remus didn't have a lock on his door, but Janus felt like now would be one of those times he'd use it. From what he knew, those two didn't like each other, they never had. But then how do you explain a moment like this? Something about the way the air felt, or maybe the way Remus was looking at Patton made him think there was more going on here that he didn't know about.  
  
He weighed his options, he could either slip away and pretend like he didn't see anything or make his presence known. Janus can't lie, he likes lurking. He likes knowing things he shouldn't, but this seemed different for some reason. For once, he didn't want to know to begin with, it put him in too weird of a position. How many times before have they done whatever this was? It didn't seem like the first time, and Janus was surprised that Remus was able to keep his mouth shut about it.  
  
He slowly closes the door again. Remus obviously cared about keeping this a secret, and he had done a pretty good job up to this point. Janus had never even thought of the two being anything other than inhospitable towards one another. Not exactly enemies, but something close to it. More than anything else, they were opposites, yet there they were. Just goes to show there are still things that he doesn't know about.  
  
Janus may not have said anything to them, but he was watching and listening now. He felt like Logan, making a mental note of the time to see how long they stayed together. He wasn't waiting for Patton to walk out, he was more so waiting for Remus to burst out of his room. He couldn't make a correct assumption of how long they were together before he saw them, but he gave them about 15 minutes. In that time of waiting, he thought.  
  
Janus wasn't one to spill secrets unless it was important for others to know, was this important? On one hand, it wasn't his place to say, but on the other hand, this is a matter that concerned him. He was one of the people that the two didn't want knowing about this. Did anyone know? He felt the smallest bit of pride in thinking he was the first to know. Anyways, he could always just ask Remus when he came out. It was less of a confrontation and more of a conversation that way. So that's what he decided to do, wait some more.  
  
Waiting seemed to take forever, and this was coming from one of the more patient of the sides. Eventually Remus did come out of his room and into the living room. Janus thought to broach the topic casually, but apparently Remus had different plans.  
  
"I know you saw us." Janus hesitated on an answer, giving Remus an opportunity to ask, "Are you going to rat us out?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you stay for the next part :)


	3. But I did everything right...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Patton can't believe its over

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Basically, chapter 1 was Remus-centric, chapter 2 was Janus-centric, so chapter 3 gets to be Patton-centric  
> Also, this one has the most dialogue  
> (By the way, sorry for the semi-long wait)

Patton thought Remus was fun. He thought he was unique and he loved sharing a space with the other side. He regrets not spending time with him sooner and not being able to spend more time with him. Sometimes he felt guilty about keeping their friendly relationship a secret, but only momentarily. The feeling always went away once they were alone together. Always alone.  
  
But Patton didn't mind that part. He might even go as far as to say he prefers it. When they were alone, it seemed like nothing could tie them down. They were free. Free to be and do anything without any repercussions, and who doesn't want that? It almost felt like they were the only sides in the mindscape when they were together.  
  
Patton never wanted it to end, but he had learned a long time ago that good things don't last long. Sometimes, you blink and you'll miss it, just like how Patton blinked and suddenly he was in a room with Remus and Janus. He didn't know how to react, so he just started to work on instinct.

Step one: Give a subtle negative reaction to Remus' presence. It needed to be something like him shifting his weight to lean more heavily away from the creative side, or maybe he could purposely flicker his eyes between Janus and Remus. Patton ended up turning his body towards the former, it was a classic move.

Step two: Patton needed to greet Janus. If Roman was there, he would greet Janus with a smile. If Virgil was there, he would greet him with simple eye contact, and if Logan was there then he would greet Janus with a formal type greeting like a stern hello. If all three were present then he would wave, and if none were present then he could do whatever he liked. But it was only Remus. That means he had to fully acknowledge Janus without saying anything to the other side.

"Hi Jan!"

"Patton," Janus started but the moral side subconsciously tuned him out. The last step was simple, he just had two options. One was to leave the room, this one wasn't applicable because he was summoned, so instead he had to ask if Remus had to be present.

"Why's Remus here?" He felt so proud of himself for following each step, and he knew Logan would be proud too if he knew. Maybe even Roman would be proud of him for doing something right. He went through every step perfectly and didn't divert even once, nothing could go wrong.

"Pat he found the body." Patton was used to Remus talking to him directly in public, that was part of his job. But he seemed to be doing it wrong. "The jigs up." What? Did...did he mean they were over? How could it be over? They had been so good, Patton had a _script_. He never messed up except for that one time, but that wasn't with Janus so how could he know?

"Listen to me, I'm not going to tell." Why was Janus looking at him like that? Patton was still relying solely on instinct at this point. His mouth was moving before he could finish processing what was happening.

"About what?"

"About us Patty." Patton shakes his head.

"No. No, nothings happening between us." Both Janus and Remus took a step towards Patton, but he was already taking two steps back.

"Patton, there's no point in lying its okay." Janus' voice was low and reassuring, but it didn't matter.

"I'm not lying." Patton's voice was desperate, desperately hanging onto the last thread of normality.

"Patton," Remus' voice was sounded so soft right now. Soft and comforting and it made everything click in Patton's head. Everything really was over, Janus had found out.

"I was doing so good." Patton muttered. He was already hugging himself, but Remus didn't hesitate to pull the other side into a tight bear hug.

"You did great Patty."

"I'm sorry." He nuzzled farther into the hug. Of course Patton was hyper aware that Janus was staring at them, but it didn't matter anymore. He couldn't tell if he liked it better like this or not, but he decided to dwell on that later. For now he'd just lose himself in the frilly fabric that was dark creativity's clothes.

Janus watched from a distance. They was something so sad about their situation. Perhaps it had to do with the hiding, or maybe he was still thinking about the desperation in Patton's voice. Whatever it was, he felt bad. Then again, he knew they had each other, and that gave him a bit of comfort.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I gave them a nice happy ending (ish)
> 
> I could totally write another chapter, but I'm not sure if I'm going to do that yet, so I'll leave it here for now. Hope you enjoyed it :)


End file.
